My best friend, St Kate ,E mailed me this:
I've added my responses back to her in red.
True Friendship
Are you tired of those sissy-ass "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises I make to you that actually speak of true friendship:

1. When you are sad -- I will help you plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.We got him good, didn't we!
2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you. No you won't, I almost died because you panicked
3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid. Wink
4 When you are scared -- I will try to calm your nerves, unless it is something silly then I will rag on you about it every chance I get . Not true. You have traveled 1/2 hour after your softball game to pick up a dead mouse in my living room. Thank you.
5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining. That's what I do. Sorry, but it's fun.
6 When you are confused I will use little words. And when you are old, I'll make my daughter change your diapers,
7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again.
I don't want whatever you have. I've already apologized for the laryngitis thing
8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass, but then I will help you get up. OMG that holiday was fun!!! although don't think we are allowed back in Mexico.
9. This is my oath..... I pledge my friendship to you to the end.

"Why?" you may ask; ................"because you are my friend". Ditto honey

Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of 4. Remember.......
A good friend will help you move.....
a REALLY good friend will help you move a body.......let me know if you ever need me to bring a shovel.
Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth

Love you too, hon.